• Am I unloveable?

    Before I start, the answer to myself and to you is no. Continue… I had a chat with my therapist recently and this question came up because it’s something I have truly believed for a long time. Not only am I unloveable, am I unlikeable? Am I annoying? Am I just quite simply the worst human ever?! Everything negative you could think of, I have asked myself the question. After a year or so of dating and the highs and lows of that, that specific question pops into my mind on a regular basis. WHY, doesn’t he like me?! WHY, did he just fuck off and never speak to me…

  • Health Anxiety Explained

    For many years I’ve written about health anxiety, my experiences and how it makes me feel. A lot of the time people are described as hypochondriacs when they worry about their health, I feel like this is an ‘old term’ for it, because doctors don’t diagnose people with hypochondria but for the sake of this post let’s get some definitions under our belts shall we; From the NHS website: “Health anxiety (sometimes called hypochondria) is when you spend so much time worrying you’re ill, or about getting ill, that it starts to take over your life.” All of this is that I speak about is from my own experience but…

  • Struggling During a Pandemic

    Now that’s a title I don’t think you’d ever expect to write in your life. A fucking PANDEMIC?! It’s been months and months and it still seems unreal. At the start of it all my mental health really wasn’t too bad, really I was in the best place I’d been for a long time. I wasn’t too deep in my health anxiety, my body confidence was high and I was happy. I haven’t been too scared by COVID this entire time, which is surprising considering my anxiety is surrounded by health. I just felt like it gives you more of a reason to try and live your life to the…

  • Dating Do’s and Don’ts

    I have terrible taste. That is not the way you want to start a post is it? But I am not here to lie to you, from my history of dating and the stories which have come from the dating I have concluded that my taste is quite frankly, a disgrace. I’m being harsh, it’s not THAT bad and if I’ve ever dated you and you’re reading this, hello, welcome and make yourself at home. Now I’m no dating expert, quite the opposite, I’d say that I am quite the novice so should you listen to me? Probably not, I have failed in getting anywhere in the dating world so…

  • Am I confident in my body now?

    Before I begin I will be discussing eating disorders, anorexia and other mental illnesses (trigger warning) I have been deep in my eating disorder recovery now for quite a few years, discharged from the clinic around 2 years ago. My eating disorder journey started at an age which I don’t really remember but hit it’s peak at age 19/20. Here I am as a 25 year old woman and I have gained so much in my life ever since then. I’ve spoken openly about my mental health for years but I feel I have always been somewhat more protective over my eating disorder. I’m not entirely sure why I was…

  • Who is your soul mate?

    Good evening to you all… Well, firstly welcome to my new platform! We’ve moved over, we’ve taken the plunge, we are getting serious here aren’t we. Anyway… In my life I have thought I’ve met my ‘soul mate’ a couple of times, was it my first ever boyfriend who I loved from the age of 14? It wasn’t. Or was it my recent ex boyfriend who I thought I’d spend forever with? It wasn’t. I don’t actually believe your soul mate is necessarily someone you are in love with, despite the idea that this is the case. My soul mate is my best friend. Someone I spend most of my…

  • The Tinder Ghost

    Hello everyone, old and new… It’s been a very long time since I last wrote on what has always been my beloved blog. The last time I was here was October last year, I’d just moved into my new flat and I was ready for a totally fresh start. However, in that time I’d lost any creative energy I’d ever had and my blog took the biggest back seat it had ever taken, it was at the back of a very long bus. The bus being my life. In the last year I’ve just been trying to figure out life as a 24/25 year old woman. What do I need…

  • Look who’s back…again

    Hello you, it’s been a while. It’s been too long, you’re like an old friend I keep meaning to meet up with but seem to avoid at all costs, my bad. I would love to say that my absence was for good reason, like I was travelling the world or doing amazing things with my life and ruling the universe. Fact of the matter is, I have just had a fucking funny year and haven’t felt like writing at all. Here I am again though, at a time when my mental health has taken a dip and I turn back to writing. I’ve spent the last few evenings just putting…

  • Scared of dying but not living.

    I’m scared of dying. Petrified actually, this whole thing with my health anxiety is based around the fear of being ill and having to end up in hospital and missing out on all that life has left to show to me.  But in the mean time, I’m not living. I’m far from it. I am living a nightmare, that’s true but living the life I am supposed to be living? Not at all.  Miserable, in pain and scared. Those are the things that seem to define me on my journey with health anxiety. Where is the happy girl I know I can be? Where does she go when she’s so…

  • Look Who Relapsed Again…

    Me, THAT’S WHO. Hi everyone, I flunked out on Blogmas and I apologise, I was really enjoying myself but then my brain took over. So it was Christmas time and what happens to me over Christmas? I freak out. I have no idea why, because I love Christmas so much. It happens most years and that’s just the way it goes, that is what I am used to. Christmas was coming and I had great news, I’d landed myself a new job in a different department at work. 2019 was setting itself up to be the best year! But then sweet, little, innocent anxiety comes in to play some games…