• Where am I at?

    Hey everyone, It’s been a tough morning, I have to say. I’m going away this weekend and this always fills me with crippling anxiety – I don’t know why. I think I’ve been building up to a bit of a breakdown all week and it happened this morning and I feel so guilty. I feel guilty that I let it get the better of me and I let it control whether or not I was going to go to work (I didn’t) – I try to be positive on here, radiate positivity and pretend I’m doing just fine. I only ever come back on here when something really gets to…

  • Everything to gain…

    Hiiiiiii everyone, another day another post about my mental health. I’ve been thinking about what I have to gain and lose from my mental health, it’s tricky. I’ve spoken before how it feels like my head is split in half, one side is stuck in the mental illness side of things – this side wants to stay in the warped comfort of my eating disorder and my anxieties that drive me up the wall daily (but also drive me… it makes sense to me). The other side of my head is the one that wants to be better, wants to live for my future and stop being stuck in this…

  • Continuing the fight.

    Hi hi hi, I haven’t posted since October, oh me. It’s been a mare of a few months, here’s a short summary – I’m employed (do I enjoy it? I shall not disclose that on the internet) ((take from that what you will)), I’m still with that Ryry Evz and we’re saving to move out, joint bank account and all! But more importantly, I’m still suffering with that eating disorder and depression that is being a cheeky mother fucker and just does not want to budge out of my life. Let’s get into it, the last time I posted I was just starting my time at the eating disorder clinic…

  • To be okay…

    Helloooo! Today (or this evening) I wanted to talk about the recovery I’m going through at the moment and people may possibly be able to relate to the way I have felt throughout.  My journey to health and happiness has been ongoing, as has my illness. My mental state is one that I’ve been open about because it’s gone on since I was 10 years old. My recovery truly started in December, however I have had many forms of counselling in the past.  What I really want to talk about is the time when I started on anti depressants in December of 2014. 10mg a day is what I started…

  • Educate Young Minds On Mental Illness.

    Hiiiii! Something really personal to me, and close to me are mental illnesses. Growing up with them and still living with many is common knowledge to those close to me, maybe even anyone who reads this blog because I believe speaking about it is THE most important thing. Last night I was having a bad one, it was almost 11pm and there I was on the brink of having yet another meltdown. Debating whether to wake my mum and have a cry, or just work through it. Then I got pissed off. I took myself back to primary school, I had no idea what anxiety was, no idea what body…